


Kiss Me Confused

by ifisayhiyousayoops



Category: youtube - Fandom
Genre: 5+1 Things, Established Relationship, Fluff, I Made A Thing, M/M, SO, fluuff, here ya go kids, it's a 5+1 fic, nothing but fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-24
Updated: 2016-04-24
Packaged: 2018-06-04 05:14:37
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,404
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6642694
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ifisayhiyousayoops/pseuds/ifisayhiyousayoops
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>5 times the others find out about Joe and Caspar and the one time they tell them all.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Kiss Me Confused

**Author's Note:**

> So, this is semi- canon compliant but the timeline's a wee bit messed up. Bear with me darlings, I hope you enjoy c:

1\. LOUISE  
  
After Joe changes his shirt for the fourth time that night because of a Darcy related mishap, he forgets all prior inhibition and promptly pushes the baby into Caspar’s arms with a mumbled-  
  
“Take her she doesn’t like me.”  
  
“Except to shit on apparently,” Caspar snickers back.  
  
Joe sighs dejectedly, “It’s not even funny anymore at this point mate, are babies even supposed to shit that much?”  
  
“I mean- the two incidents were about four hours apart so I’m guessing it’s not all that unnatural is it?”  
  
Joe heaves a sigh before resting his head on the back of the couch while Caspar gently rocks Darcy on his lap, emitting cooing noises. Joe turns to him, “You sound like a fucking seal.”  
  
Caspar mock whines in offence, mimes shutting Darcy’s ears and says, “Don’t swear in front of Darcy; also, she isn’t crapping on me so I’m guessing I did something right.”  
  
As if on cue Darcy gurgles happily and smashes her fat fists into Caspar’s cheeks, Caspar coos enthusiastically in return nudging his face into her hands. He turns to Joe smiling wide and happy, the apples of his cheek rosy in the yellow light of Louise’s Living room.  
  
Albeit exhausted and grimy with the day’s happenings, Joe smiles back, leaning over to plant a small kiss on Caspar’s wide grin.  
  
“You’re good with her yeah? Don’t think I would’ve managed without you.”  
  
Caspar pecks him back before responding, the blue of his eyes sparkling,  
“Don’t be modest Joe, she liked you fine-“  
  
“For shitting on maybe, yeah,” Joe grumbles  
  
Caspar laughs, muttering “poor jojo” in a horrifying rendition of a baby voice which makes him sound like an axe murderer. But Darcy’s giggling pitches up nonetheless.  
  
Figures.  
  
They’re babysitting for Louise, while Tom and she go out without Darcy for the first time in almost 9 months. Originally, Louise had asked Alfie and Zoe- but they’d had to attend Alfie’s mother’s birthday dinner. So Joe and Caspar, who were visiting Brighton for the day, graciously volunteered in their stead.  
Louise was unaware that they’d been dating for over 6 months now. Not yet ready to tell anyone, Joe and Caspar had kept their relationship firmly under wraps.  
But It helped of course, that they had been tactile from the start always touching and leaning on each other. Caspar was flirty with everyone (though hardly anyone had noticed that in recent months this had ceased completely) and so people didn’t question any overt advances on his part. Joe of course, managed to control his tendencies much better, naturally concealing all affection with sarcasm and teasing (not many noticed the gentler way with which he addressed Caspar).  
  
They sat on the couch swathed in a quilt that smells of baby powder and strawberries watching the mind numbing rubbish on BabyTV. At around 9, Joe yawns and Darcy starts crying immediately thereafter.  
Joe turns his exhausted gaze to Darcy and then to Caspar who sat with his head nestled on Joe’s shoulder, only half awake. He kisses Caspar’s forehead softly before gently wrestling Darcy from his hold to begin rocking her in his arms. Caspar’s arms wind around his waist, his nose nuzzling the side of Joe’s neck.  
When Darcy’s crying lowers but continues incessantly Caspar sleepily suggests humming to her. Unable to think of a better alternative, Joe ends up humming “Sorry” by Justin Bieber ( -yeah, he’s not proud).  
  
Gradually both the boy on his shoulder and the girl in his arms are lulled to sleep. And rendered immobile, Joe simply ensures that Darcy stays in his arms before orienting his body towards Caspar. It’s not long before he surrenders to the pull of slumber, nose buried in Caspar’s hair and Darcy’s fingers curled around his arm.  
  
30 minutes later, that’s how Louise finds them while Tom hangs their coats up in the closet. Joe with his nose buried in Caspar’s hair, his lips resting on Caspar’s hairline and a snoring Darcy in his arms. Caspar nuzzling Joe’s shoulder, his arms tight around Joe’s waist even while asleep.  
  
Louise motions to Tom to be quiet and gently coaxes Darcy form Joe’s hold. The minute Darcy vacates his arms Joe- still asleep- turns his body to Caspar. His arm reaches from under Caspar’s armpit to wrap around his back while his other arm remains lodged between his and Caspar’s chests- pressed against Caspar’s heartbeat.  
  
She tightens the quilt around them the best she can while still holding Darcy and then switches off the lights to take Darcy to her cot.  
  
When she returns to her room, Tom glances up at her from the bathroom, toothbrush in his mouth. He spits in to the sink before turning to Louise, eyebrows raised in surprise-  
“You didn’t tell me they were dating,”  
  
Louise guffaws her eyes incredulous and bright, “I didn’t know-…we should ask them in the morning.”  
  
The next morning Louise wakes up earlier than usual and makes her way down to the kitchen after checking on Darcy. She crosses the couch, quilt folded and draped over the arm and the cushions fluffed to perfection.  
  
She reckons Joe made Caspar clean up after himself and she thinks (not for the first time) that they might be so, so good for each other.  
  
She enters the kitchen to Joe sitting on one of the bar stools near the counter, doing the crossword from yesterday’s newspaper, fingers firmly laced around a cup of coffee. Caspar stands behind him leaning over his shoulder while guzzling from a water bottle.  
  
They both glance up when she enters and smile with a, “Good morning Louise” murmured in unison.  
  
Louise walks over pinching Caspar on the nose and then grabbing Joe’s  
  
“AHHH owwW – Louise wha- “  
  
“Why didn’t you tell me about you two?”  
  
Immediately their grumbling seizes and both boys’ gazes slide to floor sheepishly, though Caspar makes no move to distance himself from behind Joe. At this point, they don’t even bother denying it, having realized that the position in which they woke up, probably gave them away (-definitely, definitely gave them away).  
  
Regardless, Joe meekly attempts-  
  
“We aren’t ready for people to know, could you not tell anyone maybe?”  
  
Louise’s gaze softens, her hands retracting from their noses,  
  
“Of course, yeah, is it a new thing? - How long have you two been together?”  
  
Caspar lifts his red face from where it abashedly buried itself in Joe’s neck and they exchange a glance again before Caspar clears his throat and mumbles,  
  
“……More than six months.”  
  
This time they run out of the kitchen before Louise can grab their noses again. 

  
  


2\. JIM AND OLI  
  
The morning that Jim and Oli find out, Joe wakes up with Caspar’s arm wrapped around his rib cage like vice. His eyes flutter open to the light reflected in the muted shades of the room. He feels Caspar's breath warm on the back of his neck. Joe grumbles and wriggles in an attempt to encourage Caspar to loosen his hold. But like everything else, this has the opposite effect on Caspar who merely tightens his hold wrapping his other arm around him as well- a smooth, warm palm pressed to Joe’s abs.  
  
“Caspar, I need to wee let me go.”  
  
“Five more minutes c’mon Joe,” Caspar sleepily pleads in return.  
  
Joe huffs and turns around gently lifting his palm to stroke the highest part of Caspar’s cheekbones. Caspar smiles before opening his eyes, a startling blue in the soft shades of the room. He leans forward gently pressing his lips to Joe’s who slips his palm from Caspar’s cheek to slide it over his shoulder, the balmy skin smooth and pliant beneath his hands. Caspar's arms wind tightly around Joe's waist, his hand pressed to the warm jut of Joe's hip bones.  
They separate with a soft slick and Joe presses his lips to Caspar’s ear, their cheeks pressed together -  
  
“BOO!” he yells at the top of his lungs scrambling from the sheets and away from Caspar’s grappling arms.  
  
“I knew it joe,” Caspar moans and continues yelling as Joe makes his way to the bathroom, “You had to ruin the moment, you do it EVERYtime …”  
  
All he hears is Joe’s laugh from the bathroom which causes an involuntary smile to grace his features.  
  
Whatever, he only pretends to be mad anyway.  
  
By eleven both of them sit ready at the table awaiting their friends’ arrival, Joe with cereal and Caspar a bagel. They bask in the other’s company and the warm sunlight that comes so rarely in London. When the buzzer chimes minutes later, jarring the silence, Caspar swoops in kissing Joe on the mouth-  
  
“Won’t get to do that for a couple of hours,” Joe mumbles forlornly and kisses back before Caspar turns to buzz Jim and Oli up.  
  
Once they set up for the video Jim explains that they’re going to be filming themselves playing heads up. As predicted Joe turns out to be brilliant at giving visual cues and him and Jim go multiple rounds (most of which don’t make it to the final cut).  
  
After another successful game between Jim and Joe and a rather miserable one with Oli, Caspar suggests switching teams. Joe agrees enthusiastically and they begin playing a round of their own. They sit facing each other knees pressed together, attention unwavering.  
  
Joe guesses one after another  
  
“Video games”  
  
“..David Beckham!”  
  
“-Michael Phelps-”  
In the background Jim mutters something about both of them speaking their own language.  
And maybe it’s that statement coupled with the adrenaline of the game but, the minute they find out that they tied nine to nine with Jim and Joe’s record, Caspar yells in victory and leans forward and-  
  
And Kisses Joe.  
  
Joe instinctively kisses back for the first quarter of a second before they both realize and spring apart, eyes wide in terror. They turn to the other two occupants of the bed whose mouths remain wide open in shock; the only sounds the echoes of heavy breathing from all the yelling that took place earlier.  
  
Caspar mumbles out a mournful, “fucking surprise!” that makes Joe snort which causes Caspar to start giggling as well, eventually resulting in both of them laughing hysterically while the other two watch on.  
  
Oli grins and asks, “So this was a joke?”  
He’s seen Caspar and Joe touch inexplicably loads of times (he hasn't quite forgotten the one time during the Binoculolz challenge when Caspar French kissed Joe’s ear) and although this is slightly overdoing it, he wouldn’t put it out of their realm of prank possibilities.  
  
Joe and Caspar look tempted but Jim shakes his head beside him, still slightly floored, and says,  
  
“I don’t think so mate, what’s going on guys?”  
  
Joe and Caspar breathless with laughter look up and exchange a look that Oli can’t decipher before turning to them, their fingers each fiddling and grasping with the bedcovers.  
“Joe and I’ve been dating for….um….nearly eight- uh- months now.”  
  
Jim recovers faster than Oli, congratulating them amidst exclamations of “I knew it” and promises to not tell anyone if they aren’t ready yet.  
  
Oli’s positive this is the most shocked he’s ever been.  
  
But when he thinks about it later that afternoon as he rides the tube on his way home he realizes that it’s probably been so obvious for so long. The way they always stand and sit so close together and the shared smiles and the, just the – the softness.  
  
He reckons had he paid attention, it would’ve been a love story worth witnessing.  
  
  
3\. TANYA  
  
Caspar seems withdrawn during the closing day of Amity Fest that year. Tanya tries to keep him involved in the conversation but he seems slightly-not sad- But, more subdued and quiet.  
  
She realizes that Joe’s absence probably has to do with it- after all the rest of them are all couples and Joe and Caspar always come as a unit anyway. Louise doesn’t have Tom with her either but she’s busy with Darcy.  
Tanya watches Caspar laugh and joke with the guys but, in general it seems forced and lack-luster.  
  
So in her own subtle way she decides to take Caspar under her wing. She realizes that he hangs at the back or the front of the whole group with one of ear bud hanging from his ear and tries to walk in his general proximity, with small attempts at conversation along the way. He seems preoccupied with his phone and she assumes that he keeps texting Joe or another friend so she allows herself to be pulled away by Jim briefly.  
  
Caspar meanwhile, worries incessantly about Joe, who’s at home sick to the stomach with most horrendous variation of this season’s favored flu. He knows he seems quieter today and that makes him Joe look pathetically codependent but honestly, he’s just a little concerned.  
  
Joe refuses any help from others even at the worst of times and downplays his problems aggressively until they seem far less severe than they really are. To top that off he couldn’t obsessively hang over Joe because their stupid hotel gave them two separate rooms which meant that when people came over to hang out (which was all the time) he had to sit on the bed and entertain them while Joe sniveled on his own on the other side.  
  
When Joe flew home to recover in peace all he really wanted to do was to go back with him, and wrap himself around his boyfriend and sleep for as long as they physically could. He never slept well without Joe anyway (Joe’s trip to LA had been a nightmare; Caspar was jetlagged without even leaving).  
  
He shoulders on though, with the help of Tanya’s carrot cake (pieces of which keep finding their way to his hands mysteriously) and Darcy and Louise’ uninterruptable cacophony.  
  
Once they get on stage, Caspar moves slightly further back, grateful that Jim and Tanya are the first ones that have to throw the paper rockets to the crowds.  
They take opposite sides of the stage spurred on by the playful chant of the audience. He yells in encouragement when Tanya launches hers like a javelin and it flies on steady to the back of the crowd. Jim whoops before following suit.  
  
Tanya makes her way back to Caspar’s side, determined stick by him after the brief interruption. When Caspar and Joe get called to throw the fliers, she watches as Caspar jokingly sets up the cardboard cutout of Joe. But, three minutes after Caspar turns around and walks back to his end of the stage she suddenly sees Joe walk on and dramatically throw down his cardboard counterpart.  
  
And, maybe it’s because she stayed so close to Caspar all evening or maybe it’s because she’s so close to him now, but when Joe walks on stage Tanya likes to think that she’s the only one that saw the complete change in Caspar’s demeanor.  
  
The crowd begins screaming and when Caspar turns around to see what happened, he notices Joe. He feels his face erupt into a smile that he sees reflected on Joe’s face. 

  


Tanya watches them exchange a smile while everyone seems in frenzy around them, trying to reach Joe and hug him, the audience and their screams only making it worse. The exchange makes her wonder, not for the first time, about the enigma that is the Jaspar friendship.  
  
And- honestly- whether it's a friendship, or more.  
But she knows it’s just wishful thinking on her part, the desire to want others to find happiness just because she’s found hers with Jim.  
  
After the show, backstage dissolves into a state of chaos that only exists in one of the numerous circles of hell. Tanya heads to a dressing room further in the back to fetch her bags when she hears voices through the porous wood of the door. She doesn’t mean to listen but she assumes they’ll be done soon enough and she’ll just go grab her things then. So she waits.  
  
“………..I’m not saying I don’t want you here but- you’re not well enough Joe.”  
  
She recognizes the voice as Caspar’s. It’s sweet, she thinks, that he cares so much.  
  
“I know but I couldn’t miss the whole fest besides, I missed you guys yeah? It was getting lonely lying there in my own snot.”  
  
“Yeah, yeah I missed you too-………wasn’t happy at all”  
  
She hears Caspar mumble and then Joe laugh, “I love you, yeah?”  
  
Tanya freezes, eyes wide.  
  
It could be platonic, it could b-  
  
“Yeah, I love you too.”  
  
Before she recovers or moves back Joe pulls the door open and takes in her shocked expression.  
  
Caspar opens his mouth to say something but Joe just launches himself at her with an ecstatic, “TAN!”  
  
Once he settles in to her arms he leans forwards and says, in barely more than a whisper,  
  
“Don’t tell anyone yet, please?”  
  
Tanya nods her head into his shoulder and holds her arms out for Caspar who wraps himself behind Joe. Her face pressed between the two boys’ she softly mumbles-  
  
“ ‘M so happy for you two.”  
  
  
4\. MARCUS  
  
Marcus thinks that eventually it was Caspar’s incessant need to touch Joe that gives them away. By touch he doesn’t mean anything overtly sexually either, but just Caspar’s arm around Joe’s waist or him pressing his face into Joe’s shoulder or lifting Joe up to throw him in the snow (- only to then pick him back up again).  
  
On Jim’s stag trip he ends up spending copious amounts of time with the duo. Mostly because Jim has other mates here whom he doesn’t see half as often as the boy band. And Alfie is busy either learning how to snowboard or talking to Zoe (who’s alone in Brighton as opposed to Niomi who has Tanya with her).  
  
He’s always thought that Joe and Caspar come as a weird sort of unit, with the excessive amount of time they spend together. But he only gets suspicious when he finds them the second morning of Jim’s stag week.  
  
Alfie and Jim have gone out to get vodka with Jim’s brother and left Marcus to wake the other two. He walks in to their room and sees the two sleeping facing each other in a tight cocoon of blankets and bare arms. Caspar’s long arms loop around Joe’s slender waist and his nose stays tucked between Joe’s jaw and the pillowcase. Joe’s arms wrap around Caspar’s shoulder with one hand buried in the unstyled blond hair.  
  
Marcus feels his eyes widen and he almost chokes on his own spit before he decides that either something between the two changed between last night and today (and they hadn’t got the chance to tell anyone yet) or , they had accidentally ended up in that position.  
  
(He completely disregards the second one because he knows that everything about wrapping yourself around a person like that is deliberate).  
  
He walks out the room and back to his and Alfie’s before yelling, “JOEYYYY” at the top of his lungs and then waiting a couple of minutes before reentering their room. He decides that they’ll tell him if there’ve been any new developments on the non-platonic front but he doesn’t want to barge in to things.  
  
When he walks in however, the site that greets him is completely different to the one he saw earlier. Both Joe and Caspar stand in their boxers on opposite sides of the bed, trying to wrestle the duvet in to something that resembles folded. He stands there with his mouth agape while the two seem unfazed about their previous sleeping position.  
  
This could mean two things- either they don’t care (he doubts they don’t though, the way they were intertwined together, it would have taken him half an hour just to untangle their legs) or, they’re used to it.  
  
Joe walks past him to get to the toilet and brush his teeth and laughs at Marcus’ shocked expression, “you alright mate, gonna catch flies with your mouth open like that.”  
  
Marcus recovers fast laughing it off, “just surprised to see Caspy trying to tidy up after himself.”  
  
Joe laughs while Caspar lets out an indignant, “HEY.” Joe yawns and continues to the toilet mumbling, “I’ve been good influence on him haven’t I?”  
  
Marcus turns to Caspar who’s still struggling with the blanket, and expects a loud retort of sorts but Caspar just smiles and keeps folding.  
  
Marcus only gets more confused after that.  
  
The next evening he walks in to find the two sprawled on the couch- Joe sitting up with Caspar’s head nestled on his lap. They ‘re engrossed on their respective phones and Joe’s hand subconsciously strokes Caspar’s hair back gently while his gaze remains fixated on twitter.  
  
They haven’t noticed Marcus yet when Caspar laughs at something on his screen and grabs Joe’s hand to show him. He watches as their fingers interlace together- it seems natural, habitual. Joe laughs at whatever’s on Caspar’s screen and Marcus watches as Caspar lifts their intertwined hands and kisses the back of Joe’s hand.  
  
He expects Joe to jump back but Joe just smiles at Caspar fondly mumbles something and continues scrolling. He watches how occasionally Joe will stop stroking Caspar's hair only to have Caspar kiss him on the palm and nudge him back.  
  
Despite his growing confusion, Marcus puts it down as a ‘best friends’’ thing.  
  
(Yeah, he knows it’s a stretch).  
  
He almost forgets about the whole ordeal until late the next evening when the three of them go out to the small pub in their resort for a quick round of drinks and a little vodka to warm them up. One of the waitresses, Kate, he notices has a bit of a thing for Joe.  
  
She flirts relentlessly while Joe smiles and goes along politely. Caspar plays along at the start too, a twinkle in his eye while he teases Joe, “go on Joe show the lady a good time,” and “yes absolutely Kate, Joe would love another drink.”  
  
Eventually though Marcus begins feeling drowsy -the syrupy flow of alcohol in his veins coupled with the soft yellow lights and warmth of the pub. He decides that its time they head back. As they put on their coats though, Kate approaches Joe and asks him if he’d like to see how the brewery in the back works. Joe’s about to decline when Marcus pipes up, “would make a sick vlog mate, especially since we aren’t uploading to our main channels this week.”  
  
So Joe hesitantly says yes and Kate smiles in return. Out of the corner of his eye, Marcus can see Caspar look down at his shoes and shuffle uncomfortably but he’s too sleepy to ask what’s bothering him.  
  
Joe tells them both he’ll see them in a bit and heads back inside with Kate. Caspar stays quiet the whole walk back and heads straight to bed when they return. Marcus changes out of his jeans, brushes the taste of stale beer out of his mouth and then does the same in record time.  
  
That night Marcus wakes up for the fifth time because of Alfie’s heavy breathing (mouth breather) and Jim’s snoring from above. He still has a rank taste in his mouth because of the alcohol and decides to grab some water. He walks in to the hallway between the bedrooms and into the kitchen when he hears whispered arguing coming from the living room.  
  
“I waited up because I thought you’d be back in half an hour like you said not at fucking midnight!”  
  
“I got carried away Caspar, sorry, she showed me the brewery and then her mates turned up and they were doing an indoor bonfire night thing of some sort - and asked me to stay.”  
  
“Yeah but you could’ve dropped a text Joe, would’ve made it easier, it didn’t help that she was trying to get in your pants all evening- “  
  
“You were encouraging her Caspa- “  
  
“It was a joke Joe, but that doesn’t mean it wasn’t uncomfortable for me when you walked off with her and you didn’t call and I waited and waited and waited- “Caspar’s voice breaks off.  
  
He hears Joe gasp softly and say, “Hey, c’mere Casp, I’m sorry alright, nothing happened. I would nev- I love you, yeah, no one else.”  
  
Marcus feels his eyes widen, he knew there was something there, but to hear a confirmation like that still comes as a shock. He looks to see their silhouettes in a tight embrace and, slowly makes his way back to the bedroom, praying they don’t see him.  
  
The next morning they head to the slopes, he’s just bent over rechecking his gear when he hears someone walk up next to him. He turns and sees Caspar smiling at him and feels his face flare red and looks back down at his board. He hears Caspar press a hand on to his shoulder before leaning down next to him, a smile in his voice-  
  
“We know you heard Marcummss, just don’t tell anyone please.”  
  
Marcus feels the start of a sheepish grin on his own face before turning around to embrace Caspar.  
  
“should’ve told me you dickheads.”  
  
And then it’s Caspar’s turn to look sheepish.  
  
  
5\. ZOE AND ALFIE  
  
Zoe likes to think she knows Joe better than almost anyone else on the planet.  
  
See, Joe’s quirky, he has fixations that become painstakingly inherent in his life and Zoe’s mastered the art of storing away these fixations and accommodating his habits.  
  
So when Joe and Caspar come to visit that weekend, Zoe is both delighted and disheartened to know that Joe has some sort of new fascination and the distance unfortunately means she doesn’t know about it.  
  
In the afternoon when Caspar and Alfie leave to take Nala for a walk and Joe stays in to edit and spend time with her, the first thing she notices is Joe increased attentiveness towards his phone, that chimes at an almost consistent three minute intervals.  
  
The second thing she sees is how much more Joe smiles- he’s always been a happy person- but it just seems more , more genuine this time round.  
  
She tells him as much, “you’re absolutely radiant like a pregnant woman Joe, have you met some girl you haven’t told me about?”  
Because really that’s what it comes down to doesn’t it.  
  
“Did you honestly just compare me to a pregnant woman?”  
  
“You haven’t answered the question..”  
  
“No, I haven’t met anyone new, Jesus.”  
  
She feels her brow furrow, “then who’ve you been texting?”  
  
He’s preoccupied with his editing again and mumbles,” ....just Caspar.”  
  
So she lets it go for now.  
  
At dinner she picks up on it again though. How much happier Joe is, he seems busy but he doesn’t seem weighed down by it.  
  
And so she watches them from across the dining table, while Alfie seems preoccupied with Nala. She watches the way Caspar and Joe have no concept of personal space (something quite rare where her brother is concerned).  
  
She watches the way Caspar looks at Joe, and the way Joe seems intent on making him laugh.  
  
And slowly pieces come together in her mind.  
She wouldn’t have guessed it but, it isn’t unprecedented either.  
Caspar grew on Joe faster than anyone she had ever met, she had almost been jealous of the way Joe had become so easily sequestered away with Caspar in London. They became two halves of the same whole; Joe would spend all his time in Brighton or with Oli when Caspar was out and Caspar would drop by with Josh just as often when it was the other way round.  
  
Later that evening she asks Joe where he wants to sleep and isn’t as surprised as bewildered by his immediate response , “We’ll sleep in the guestroom upstairs.”  
  
She blinks at him before responding,” there are two beds and you’d rather sleep on the same one?”  
  
Caspar pipes up before she finishes,” I’ve got soft arms, ‘s why Joe likes them.”  
  
She watched Joe shoot him an unbearably fond look that also somehow asks him to shut up-before-you-make-the-situation-worse.  
  
“As if that makes it anymore understandable,” she hears Alfie snort from the couch.  
  
But anyhow, Joe and Caspar do manage to sleep in the same room and her suspicions are more than confirmed when she peeks in at night to find them wrapped around each other.  
  
Honestly, even her and Alfie aren’t that bad.  
  
The next morning she manages to corner Caspar in the kitchen and gives him a stern eye,  
  
“You better not break my brother’s heart or I’ll break your entire face,” she’s small but she can be plenty intimidating when she tries.  
  
Caspar’s mouth opens and closes a few times before he settles on,” what do you mean?”  
  
“Come on now Caspar, I know my brother and I know when he’s in a relationship and- .... and more than that, I know when he really cares about a person.”  
  
“He really cares about you too, though..?” he tries.  
  
“Don’t be thick Caspar, I meant in an emotional, I-could-love-you way.”  
  
Caspar sighs before nodding,” Yeah, yeah- okay.”  
  
“Okay yeah what?”  
  
“Yeah we’re together and yeah I won’t hurt him,” Caspar looks down at his socks before looking up with a smile so fond and soft that she can’t help but return it.  
  
“Yeah well, I’m the only one allowed to hurt him which is what I’m going to do when I see him next.” She turns to the tea kettle with mutter of, “dimwitted brother, didn’t even tell me.”  
  
Caspar smiles wider and leans against the marble counter, “now now, that’s my boyfriend you’re talking about.”  
  
“Whose boyfriend?” Joe mumbles walking into the kitchen, his hair flopping on to his face while he rubs sleep out of his eyes.  
  
Caspar barely has time to apologize before Zoe launches herself at him. 

  
  


+1 THE ONE TIME THEY TOLD EVERYONE  
  
“Hi guys my name’s Caspar Lee and today I’m here with my roommate Joe Sugg.”  
  
“Hey guys.”  
  
Caspar gently grasps Joe’s hand under the camera before he continues,  
  
“So today I decided to do a Q and A and those are always more fun with Mr. Sugg, amirite?”  
  
Joe grins exaggeratedly at the camera before turning to his phone, “Okay, first question, if you had a son besides Emma Lee what would you name him?”  
Almost immediately after, he hears Joe snort, “Jesus, gonna have us have a barnyard full of kids at this rate.”  
  
And so the questions continue until they reach the one they get Josh to tweet from a made-up account,  
  
“How long have you been together for?”  
Joe immediately starts laughing which makes Caspar watch him and smile too, they know their viewers expect some kind of sarcastic response that answers nothing and brushes it all under the rug but-  
  
“I’d say about a year, give or take a month when this Rodney was too busy being confused about his feelings to just get on with it.”  
  
Caspar pouts,” Hey, I made the first move.”  
  
“Did not, I had to make the first move to make you make your first move, which means yours was the second move which, my dear Caspy, is not the first.” Joe smiles at him before leaning overp and kissing his lips with a resounding smack.  
  
Caspar turns back to Camera waggling his eyebrows, “Is there any way we could get an advance on that barnyard full of kids?”  
  
Joe shoves him on the shoulder before turning to bitch at the camera about how long he’s been stuck with this “stupidly tall south African without anyone knowing” and Caspar just grins and grins and grins.  
_____  
  
The days that follow the video are hectic, I the true nature of the world they lose followers but gain more. They get texts from their friends varying from” I knew it,” to, “ I always thought…” to a simple heartbreak emojii from Troye to Caspar and a deafeningly loud voice message congratulating them from Tyler to Joe.  
  
The next premiere they go to Caspar ducks out of the car first before turning around and clasping Joe’s warm hand in his. They walk out on to the red carpet with pleasantly sweaty palms and screams that continue to ring in their ears a week later.

  


**Author's Note:**

> Come say hi on tumblr, ifisayhiyousayoops. Thanks for reading <3


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